7. Bill O'Reilly
How The Grinch Saved Christmas
222 Points

Fact: On his nightly TV show, Bill delivers hard, "no-spin" views and interviews!

Fact: Bill denies being a conservative!

Fact: In 2000, Bill quickly changed his voter registration from Republican to independent after reporters made inquiries!

Fact: Bill was punter for the Marist College football team!

Fact: Bill has anchored TV news and weather in Scranton, Dallas, Denver, Portland (Oregon), Hartford, Boston and New York City!

Fact: Bill is happily married with two children!

Fact: When it comes to the ladies, Bill is a breast man!

Fact: Once, while describing a lusty shower fantasy to a young assistant, Bill embarrassingly confused a Middle Eastern lunch treat, the falafel, with a coarse variety of sponge, the lufa!

Fact: Bill has often falsely claimed to have won two Peabody Awards!

Fact: Bill has called the ACLU "the most dangerous organization in America!"

Fact: Bill has called anti-war activist/war mother Cindy Sheehan a "coward!"

Fact: Whenever he can, Bill bravely speaks out in favor of Christmas!

And we’re sure Bill has the courage to be a top AHOY!


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